4 Years Ago On This Day March 17
March 17 2004 Manie was eight days old and having open heart surgery. For everyone else it is just another day well actually it is St. Patty’s Day. For me this day has another meaning now. It is a day to remember how far Manie has come and how much he has had to go through to get here.
When I think back to that day my heart beats just a little faster. I think about seeing my baby being wheeled into the operating room. I think about the twelve hr. wait and about how that whole time I had to stop my mind from wandering into a place of what ifs and imagining what Manie looked like laying there with his chest cut open. I had to stop myself from questioning how the doctor was going to fix something so small and delicate. I had to let go and let God take care of it.
Finally after the twelve long hrs. of waiting and wondering I saw my baby being wheeled out of the operating room. My heart sank as I saw even more tubes and wires coming from his body. Four large drain tubes protruded from his tiny chest along with a pace maker. From the bottom of his little neck down to the top of his belly button there was a piece of tape where the doctor had stitched Manie back together. Manie’s little body had already started to swell. Thousands of thoughts seemed to rush through my mind all at the same time. I just wanted to pick Manie up and wish all of his pain away.
The doctor came out and talked with us and told us that everything went fine. I knew it was a lie because an operation that was only suppose to take six hrs took twelve. I did not care I just wanted to be by Manie and never take my eyes off of him again. The strange part about it is that my baby was laying there looking like hell and I was grateful. I prayed to God and I thanked him that Manie was strong and he was still with me.
I could never make anyone understand the feelings that I felt on that day and I would not want too. As the tears stream down my face as I write this I know is this just another day for those at GlaxoSmithKline? Here is a message for you guys at GSK who like to read my blog…
Remember this day March 17 because this is a day I celebrate that my child was strong enough to live, but this is a day when you should hang your head in shame. On this day March 17 you forced Manie to be strong and experience hell just to live. Something that was rightfully his was taken and you made him fight to get it back.